Adventures in Health: The Dreaded Gym

In my last post I explained how trapped I felt by obesity, but that I had been able to overcome that and begin a journey toward health. When I wrote that post, I had no idea the outpouring of love and support that I would receive. All the comments that I received really helped me realize just how far I have come and how much my story can have an impact. I appreciate everyone's support, and I hope you enjoy the next chapter of my story.

I know that most overweight, out-of-shape individuals have a fear of the gym. There are fears of failure, pain, and embarrassment. I know these fears well and lived with them for most of my life. Until I went to grad school I had stepped into a gym only a handful of times.

I started grad school in the summer of 2008. During the first summer session I only had one class that only met a few times a month. I knew that I wanted to start living a healthier lifestyle so when a couple of my roommates, who were less than half of my size, said they were going to the school's gym, I decided to join them.

My roommates jumped on the elliptical and, for 30 minutes, went at it like Olympic athletes. I on the other hand, feeling highly uncomfortable, decided to play it safe with the stationary bike at a snails pace. I have to say that I'm pretty sure that it was only by the grace of God that I stayed moving on that bike the whole time. By the end of the 30 minutes I was exhausted while my roommates appeared as if they hadn't done a thing. Yet I didn't feel discouraged. I knew I had taken a step, however small it might be, in the right direction.

I continued to return to the gym with my roommates several times during the weeks following. Even though I still wasn't at their level, I started to feel like I was accomplishing something and I felt stronger. I started appreciating myself more and more each time I completed a workout, even before I started noticing anything changing on the scale or with how I looked.

After a few workouts, I decided to give the elliptical a try. It was brutal. Even on the lowest resistance setting I could only complete 10 minutes. By that time, however, I had gained some confidence, and I knew that the elliptical was a great challenge that I had to conquer.

I then got busy with school and could only visit the gym on Fridays and Saturdays. But I knew that I had begun something that was giving me hope and happiness. I knew that I couldn't stop no matter what. So throughout my year of grad school I continued to make myself go to the gym, through rain, lots of snow, sleet, and sun.

I'm happy to report that by the end of that year in grad school I could complete 45 minutes on the elliptical at a moderate pace with various inclines. I got to the point where my skinny roommates wouldn't come workout with me anymore cause I would stay at the gym too long. I also did workouts, including belly dance, yoga, and stability ball, in my room on nights that I had class. When the weather got nicer I started walking outside and would walk for hours at a time.

I was finally becoming happy with what my body could do and what it was beginning to look like. I lost my 40 pounds that year, but that was only the beginning.